Living

This is basically a micro-blog where I can “publish” things and be fairly confident that no one is reading them.

• whenever i shave i keep nicking myself because of my super sharp jawline and my preference for old-school tools call that suffering from success

• i lack a good word for this, so we’ll say it pisses me off that the time to learn how to live overlaps with actually living. this is bad design. i need to make enough mistakes to know what i want and what i need and what i value and pass an exam on those so my brain is like a cache for my heart and only then should i be allowed to live.

• i’ve been ending a lot more of my sentences with “i don’t care” lately. it’s relaxing. it’s had the same effect that turning on read receipts had for me; open loops close quickly and don’t turn into a headache, and that makes me feel nicer about the people in my phone (who are obviously not the same people i meet in real life, but somehow have the same names and everything).

• i think i should grow a moustache.

• thinking of a “reminders” list where i basically just write down little phrases i come across that remind me of someone or someplace. i suppose i like making lists.

• put a bookshelf together! problem solved. everyone pat me on the back.

• i need to make my room feel softer somehow. hmmm. think kakar think.

• i need to learn how to make a proper cappuccino. wait is that how you spell it? oh yes it is, just googled it. genius.

• i miss having a bluetooth speaker.

• it’s snowing outside, and i mean, i can see tires digging into snow now. this is really pretty, and kinda terrifying because i haven’t bothered to get snow boots yet. gulp.

• talking to a friend and realizing that there’s likely a finite amount of time left before we can no longer have this kind of conversation with each other.

• got an email from the local library asking me to return the book i’d borrowed. it was an okay book; i just like being part of a library. don’t get me wrong - blossoms in bangalore is good and champaca is beautiful (these are not the same thing; going to champaca is the gold standard of performative reading but you do need that sometimes) but bookstores in general cannot compare with a real, proper, massive, organized, stone-building-with-computers-on-every-floor library.

• don’t really feel like going out today. will probably stay in and just do some fall cleaning (is that a thing?).